


meerkats are something that can be so personal

by Masterofkarate



Category: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Genre: (sort of), Alcohol, Cuddling, Drunken Confessions, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Jealousy, Love Confessions, M/M, drunk cuddling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-17 21:55:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21950314
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Masterofkarate/pseuds/Masterofkarate
Summary: the events that led to the gang texts as told by me.
Relationships: Charlie Kelly/Mac McDonald
Comments: 2
Kudos: 46





	meerkats are something that can be so personal

**Author's Note:**

> this is nothing but i miss charmac a lot

“Charlie, goddamn it, why can’t you get the match?”

“Well, I mean, it was easier to rig these things before they got all fancy and you put Netflix inside it,” Charlie said, laying on the floor, head and arms behind the television. 

“We didn’t put Netflix  _ inside  _ of the T.V.,” Dennis said, rubbing his temple.

“Oh, then you think you could unplug it?”

“Goddamn it, Charlie! Can you please fucking get reception for anything other than goddamn Animal Planet?”

“I’m trying the best I can! I don’t see you helping!”

“Whatever, dudes, I guess we can’t watch the match. We could go out to a bar and see if anybody’s playing it,” Mac suggested.

“Of course everybody’s playing it, but do you know how packed every fucking bar is going to be? We would’ve had to get there at three in the afternoon if we actually wanted a place to sit. Frank should have just stopped being so stingy and paid for us to play it at the bar.”

“Frank still thinks wrestling is bullshit faking,” Charlie said, squirming out from behind the television, still sitting on the floor.

“Well it’s fine, guys, I can set my phone up to get updates. That’s almost as good as watching it!” Mac said with a grin, very excited at his own ingenuity.

“That’s not almost as good,” Dennis said, rolling his eyes. “Whatever, I’m going to bed.”

“Whatever,” Charlie huffed. When Dennis’ bedroom door closed, Charlie looked at Mac and said, “He’s in a mood.”

Mac shrugged and said, “Whatever, let’s move past it. We could just fuck around and watch animal planet.”

Charlie shrugged and stood up. They put popcorn in the microwave and each chugged a beer during the three minute wait. Mac carried the popcorn bowl, Charlie carried two six packs of bottom tier beer and they walked back out to the living room.

“Dude, when’s the last time we actually watched cable?” Mac asked as they sat down, bowl of popcorn between them, beer in hand. 

“I dunno, like forever. And dude, this is animal planet, this shit’s gonna get us so smart.”

“I know man, we’re gonna learn so goddamn much, just from watching TV. That’s so badass!”

“Yeah it is! I can’t wait to learn about these weird squirrels!”

“I’m pretty sure those aren’t squirrels, buddy. They’re meerkats.” 

“I don’t know about that, I’m pretty much a cat expert and those don’t look like cats to me.”

“Because they’re not normal cats,” Mac explained.

Charlie nodded and said, “Alright, I’ll hear out these near-cats. Our brains are just gonna like be blasted with knowledge.”

“Too bad Dennis’ toxic masculinity won’t allow him to sit back and enjoy some cute animals and learn some shit.”

“His…” Charlie trailed off, “Dude if anybody’s muscles are muscly enough to be toxic, they’re yours.”

“That’s not what that means, but you really think so?”

“Yeah, I mean, I know we all pretend you’re not totally ripped, but you’re totally ripped,” Charlie told him.

“Shit, thanks, yeah, it’s kinda shitty that everybody cared when I was fat, but nobody cares now that I’m jacked.”

“I know man, I totally care, I’m sorry, you know how it is, like I  _ want _ to tell you you’re hot, but like everybody else is around and for some reason like, I get all nervous about it, you know?”

Mac nodded and said, “No, I get it. I mean, you’re totally illiterate, but I never made fun of you for it before everybody else started.”

“Yeah, it’s cool,” Charlie shrugged. “I’m not illiterate though.”

“Charlie, I had to teach you how to write out your own name. And you didn’t even notice that I taught you wrong.”

“You taught me wrong?”

“Naw, I meant you wouldn’t notice if I did teach you wrong,” Mac said, smiling a little bit, because he didn’t want Charlie to change how he wrote his name. He very much loved when Charlie wrote out “CAT <3 MAC” on notes or cards, it was like a secret language.

“I knew you wouldn’t do that to me,” Charlie hummed.

“I’d never steer you wrong, dude,” Mac answered, looking over at Charlie with a smile. He moved the mostly-empty bowl of popcorn to the coffee table. He grabbed two beers from the six pack on the coffee table, handing one to Charlie.

It went quiet as they watched the documentary. Charlie didn’t know how it happened or why he noticed or why it made the air in his throat feel thick, but somehow he and Mac were closer than before. They weren’t touching, but they were close. Charlie decided it was probably because he was getting tired and he wasn’t used to sleeping alone. His subconscious scooted himself closer to Mac. He leaned forward and grabbed another beer, purposefully shifting a few inches away. When Mac did the same, he flopped down closer to Charlie again. Before Mac finished his beer, Charlie grabbed another one. He pulled at the label between large swigs.

“Dude, these things are wild!” Charlie said as the narrator spoke, he needed to break the silence. He hoped his words would somehow thin out the air.   
  


“They are, we should totally see if we can see them at the zoo.”

“The zoo!” Charlie said, perking up. “Shit, I don’t think I’ve ever been to the zoo!”

“Me neither!” Mac said. “We’ll get the whole crew together, Frank can pay for the tickets, we’ll go see the meerkats!”

“I’m so ready for that man!” Charlie laughed, clapping his hands. “Ima piss on some meerkats, show them what’s up.”

“You absolutely can not piss on a meerkat,” Mac scoffed. “That’s not how that works.”

“You don’t know that, you’re barely listening to the movie!”

“Neither are you!” Mac shouted, though it was clear he wasn’t angry, they were both smiling. 

“Whatever, maybe we can see a meerkat piss on another meerkat.”

“Why is that the one fact you’re latching onto?”

“What else did you learn from the documentary?” Charlie challenged

“Uh- the chicks are more dominant,” Mac said.

Charlie shrugged and said, “I dunno, you’re probably right.”

And again, more silence. Another beer each. And again, Charlie's body was closer to Mac's. And again, the air in the room felt thicker than air should feel. The way it feels after a glue overdose or when there's too many toxins in the air. Charlie hadn't huffed anything for hours, though, and he knew Dennis and Mac's apartment was fine in terms of carbon monoxide.

Mac was the one to break the silence this time. Not commenting on the documentary at all.

"Do you really think I'm hot, dude?"

"I mean- uh- I…" Charlie rubbed the back of his neck and laughed. He finished his beer and leaned forward to grab another before answering, "Yeah, dude, of course you are. Like look at your abs."

Mac nodded, self-satisfied smile. After a moment, he asked, "Do other people think I'm hot?"

"I mean, I'm sure-"

"Yeah, but like, do you guys talk about it?"

"You're just trying to figure out if Dennis thinks you're hot, aren't you?"

"Well, no. Sort of."

Charlie rolled his eyes. He mumbled, "Dennis is a bastard man, even if he was into you, he'd be a shitty boyfriend."

"You don't know that, he-"

"Have you heard how he talks about the chicks he bangs?"

"Yeah, but I talked bad about chicks before I was out, but now that I'm gay, like, I don't think I'd treat dudes shitty."

"Yeah, but you're a better person than Dennis."

"Thanks man," Mac said. He grinned and put his arm over Charlie's shoulders. 

Charlie couldn't help but notice how much more affectionate he's been since he came out. Not like he was hitting on Charlie- he'd already stated how much better he can do than Charlie. And Charlie wasn't gay, nobody even thought so like they did with Mac (before he came out) and Dennis now. It was nice though. Maybe not in a gay way, maybe it reminded Charlie of when they were kids, before Mac was afraid of being gay. Or maybe it was in a gay way. But no, because Charlie's not gay. So he let his head fall against Mac's chest. It wasn't gay because Charlie was tired and Mac was warm and his muscles weren't toxic.

"Are you falling asleep? Cause I can-"

"No," Charlie mumbled. "I'm not falling asleep. Just tired."

"Okay, bud," Mac murmured.

"Mac," Charlie whispered.

"Uh, yeah?"

"Were your muscles toxic before you were gay?"

"Uh, you mean the toxic masculinity thing? Yeah, I was fucked up by that shit before I came out."

"Is that why we never did this?"

"I mean, maybe," Mac answered softly.

"I know you love Dennis," Charlie whispered, "But I like this a lot. You're warm. And you smell better than Frank."

Mac laughed and shook his head, "You're drunk, dude."

"I'm not wasted, though. I do like this."

"I like it too, man."

"In a gay way?"

"Charlie, I-"

"It's fine. You can do better than me, I get it. I'm like the weirdest guy ever, you don't like my radiator cooking and I'm covered in rat blood like every day and like-"

"It's not that," Mac said quickly. "Yeah, you're weird, man, but like, I don't really hate that. We've been best friends since I can remember. I've done tons of weird shit with you, it's kinda cool, actually. Like, around you, I never have to worry about being badass or cool or whatever."

"Well yeah, because you're always sorta badass. Even when you're not, I think you kind of are," Charlie interrupted, eyes closing.

"Exactly, man. And that's cool. But like, since when do you want me to like you in a gay way? Are you just jealous of Dennis and like think this is the way to… beat him?"

"No. I mean, maybe I'm a little jealous of Dennis. And I don't know why I want you to like me in a gay way. But my palms get sweaty around you sometimes and my brain goes fuzzy sometimes when you smile at me a certain way and this feels really good and I don't know."

"Do you like… do you like me or some shit?"

"I don't know. Yeah, I think."

"I'm not going to ruin our friendship for you not knowing. Plus, like you're drunk, I'm buzzed. Maybe we should talk about this another time."

"We'll probably bury it deep down," Charlie whispered.

"We don't have to."

"Yeah, but we will," Charlie said softly. "Can you just stay here for now though, before we bury it? Just til the documentary's over?"

"Yeah dude," Mac whispered. He kissed the top of Charlie's head. Charlie swallowed the thick air audibly. Mac rubbed his shoulder gently. 

Charlie fell asleep soon after as the British narrator told them about the burrowing talents of meerkats. Mac waited until he was struggling to keep his eyes open before leaving Charlie, he put a blanket over him and walked back to the bedroom. Charlie was probably right, this was something they'd probably ignore. Mac knew it was shitty, but he couldn't put his feelings for Dennis away just because Charlie had feelings for him and he may feel some of those things back towards Charlie. And even if he could, could he risk fucking things up with Charlie? Charlie was the closest thing he'd ever had to real family, and sure Dennis was great, but Charlie got him on levels nobody else ever did. 

Mac started to worry, but then he thought about the way he'd kissed the top of Charlie's head. The way his hair smelled kind of greasy but also comforting. He thought about the nervous sound Charlie made. His stomach flipped and suddenly he hoped this wasn't something they would bury. Curled up in bed, he started scrolling through the Philadelphia Zoo's website, mentally planning their trip to the zoo. 


End file.
